What a fucking waste of an outfit
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
