used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
