I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize