As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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