p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
