My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
