at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
