I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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