Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
