I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
