I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
