At least make sure they are 18
Why
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
