I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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