David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Randomize
