I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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