Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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