Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
