I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
