yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
