well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Randomize
