Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
