If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
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