there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
