i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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