trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Randomize