I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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