Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
