those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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