some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
