i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Randomize
