thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
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