I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
