My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
too bad you live with your parents still
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
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