i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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