I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
