Kareoke will never be a sober sport
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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