He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
