What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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