if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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