so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize