I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
You are the jesus of drinking
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
