So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Randomize
