just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
