I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize