Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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