Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
