You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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