you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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