can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
