i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize